Modern Family Season 11 premiere: 5 Funniest moments

MODERN FAMILY - "Spanks for the Memories" - When Jay overhears Gloria on the phone talking about spanking, he assumes she is frustrated in the bedroom. When he attempts to light the spark again by giving her exactly what she wants, he realizes he might have made a mistake. Meanwhile, now that Mitchell has an amazing new job, he and Cam throw a party to rub it in Cam's friends' faces so they can no longer give him "the look of pity," on "Modern Family," WEDNESDAY, MARCH 7 (9:00-9:31 p.m. EST), on The ABC Television Network. (ABC/Ron Tom)ERIC STONESTREET, JESSE TYLER FERGUSON
MODERN FAMILY - "Spanks for the Memories" - When Jay overhears Gloria on the phone talking about spanking, he assumes she is frustrated in the bedroom. When he attempts to light the spark again by giving her exactly what she wants, he realizes he might have made a mistake. Meanwhile, now that Mitchell has an amazing new job, he and Cam throw a party to rub it in Cam's friends' faces so they can no longer give him "the look of pity," on "Modern Family," WEDNESDAY, MARCH 7 (9:00-9:31 p.m. EST), on The ABC Television Network. (ABC/Ron Tom)ERIC STONESTREET, JESSE TYLER FERGUSON /
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Modern Family returns and proves why it’s been one of the best comedies on tv for the past 10 years. Here are the best moments from last night’s episode.

Modern Family returned last night for the first episode of its final season. It doesn’t feel like 10 years have passed, but when you see how big Lily has gotten and remember how young Luke, Manny, and Alex were when the show started, it’s hard to ignore. With a set deadline, we can expect the writers will unleash all the funny they have been holding back and go out with a bang.

That started last night as the Cam and Mitch storyline was some of the best stuff we’ve gotten from them over the years. We left off with Haley having just had the babies and the new mother butting heads with the grandparents was another storyline. Finally, we saw Manny embarrass himself and lose Sherry so that story also gets revisited.

All 3 of these moments land in our top 5.

5. Gloria destroys Manny

As mentioned above, Manny lost Sherry after proposing to her at his birthday party. He spent the rest of the episode (which spanned months) still crying over her. At the start of the premiere we find out that Jay is shooting a commercial for Stella’s dog beds and he has cast Sherry as the voice of Stella. Jay agrees to let Manny join as director and Gloria doesn’t like the idea of them sharing a space.

"“You do this after Sherry broke his heart after being repulsed by the idea of marrying him?”"

This is delivered as a sign of Jay being a bad step-father by working with Sherry, but Manny definitely feels the brunt of this attack. It really was bad, though.

4. Haley and Dylan name the babies

At the end of the Season 10 finale, it is mentioned that the babies won’t be named until Haley’s drugs wear off. When we return for the new season, we find out what they ended up naming them.

It appears that Haley named the girl and Dylan named the boy. Haley named her daughter Poppy, after her favorite flower and Dylan named his son George. Why you ask?

"“Because he came out looking curious. Like Boy George.”"

This is a classic Modern Family comedic move. The line was already funny because we thought he named his son after Curious George but then he adds the second line and actually makes it worse. Glad to see fatherhood hasn’t changed Dylan much.

3. Super Mom

Later in the episode Haley, Phil, and Claire lock themselves out of the house with the babies inside and panic. Without hesitation Haley climbs the van and then onto the roof with the speed of an American Ninja Warrior competitor and is inside the house.

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This was after she talked about having no maternal instincts. Claire points out that she clearly has instincts if she sprung into action like that. Then, not two seconds later, Luke calmly walks out of the house and tells his parents that the babies are upstairs and asks if someone is going to take care of it. They could have just knocked.

2. Cam loves the kids

Finally, we get to the Cam storyline. As I mentioned it was some of the best stuff the show has done and it was executed well. I hope I can do it justice here.

At the start of the episode we find out that Cam has invited a group of at-risk youth to the house Saturday to try to inspire them to stay on the right path. The kids come over and Cam is being embarrassingly weird, playing guitar and acting like he’s doing these kids some huge favor. Mitchell is embarrassed, but excited to be able to speak to them as the face of law enforcement (he is still working with the District Attorney.)

However, just as Mitchell goes to speak, Cam realizes his porcelain clown figurine is missing. After just talking to the kids about how he knows how it feels to have the finger pointed at him (in a terrible way that I don’t even want to write out for fear it needs to be censored), he immediately accuses one of them of stealing the figurine. When Mitchell points out the hypocrisy from his previous statement, Cam says:

"“Oh please, they’re trash. They know it, we know it, everyone knows it.”"

He says it in such a matter-of-fact way that it completely caught me off guard. Don’t mess with his figurine!

Later, when he accuses one of the girls directly, she tells him that no one took his figurine and calls him Cameron. He had previously told them to call him Cam because at his house he’s not the vice principal. However, when she does this here, he responds:

"“It’s Vice Principle Tucker. Show some respect. I’m not your mom’s pimp!”"

Once again, please don’t touch his figurines.

1. The truth comes out

Eventually, we get an aside with Mitchell where he confesses that he stole the figurine. He hasn’t told Cam and had planned to blame it on the cleaning lady, but things are getting out of control. As the kids try to leave, Cam stops them. When one of the girls says that she has to get home soon, Cam responds:

"“I’ve read your file Belinda. No one knows or cares where you are.”"

With the kids seated at the end of the episode, they start to let the guilt hit them. One says that society is right and that he is just going to get some tattoos and join a local gang. Other kids start to make similar statements before Mitchell finally steps up to accept blame and tell the kids that they have their whole futures ahead of them.

Next. Tuesday tv ratings report. dark

And scene! Cam thanks the kids for their service and tells Mitchell that he got the kids from the theater class to come over to trick him into confessing to throwing out the doll. He knew it was Mitchell the entire time and went to these lengths to get a confession.

You have to love Cam’s level of pettiness.

Modern Family is back and so far it looks like we’re in for a treat. They return next Wednesday at 9/8 Central on ABC.