My Feet Are Killing Me Season 1, Episode 8: First to worst
Does My Feet Are Killing Me ever finish an episode without at least a few viewers vomiting? It’s unlikely, and the streak continues this episode.
Dr. Ebonie Vincent and Dr. Brad Schaeffer are back for My Feet Are Killing Me, where their respective good looks are on the completely opposite end of the spectrum as their patients’ feet. At some point, the show should just focus more on the doctors and less on the gross feet.
Fair warning, this episode is titled “Fixing Frankenstein” and it’s disgusting.
O’Shay has foot psoriasis
This guy is back for a repeat visit because he didn’t do what Dr. Ebonie told him to do. As a result, his toes look disgusting. Very similar to Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade.
Dr. Ebonie is not terribly upset despite O’Shay’s feet looking like they were used as models for the transformation scenes in Teen Wolf. She trims this dude’s nails, collects the co-pay, and sends him to the house.
Xan’s Tetris toe
A dune buggy accident led to Xan’s right big toe to bend at a 90 degree angle and causes serious issues walking. He’s also a drummer, and it’s interfering with his music. While we’d like them all to be straight pieces and blocks, Xan’s L-piece is really causing him issues. Dr. Ebonie calls it a Mallet Toe, but I can barely pay attention to her explanation because of her perfect smile.
Once she says “insert a screw,” however, she has my attention. It sounds brutal, and apparently she went to Lowe’s for a saw and 6-inch deck screws before the surgery. I guess it’s appropriate since we’re talking hammer and mallet toes. At one point in the procedure she literally uses a mallet to hit a hammer toe, and the irony is delicious.
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Susan’s gangster lean
She says her foot has a little monster, and every step she takes hurts. It looks like a bunion upon first viewing, but it could also be because her left toes are extremely pissed at her right toes. The positive to her situation is that her second and third toes are always crossed for good luck. The technical term is “skew foot.”
The best and worst part of Susan’s case is Dr. Brad’s poor grasp of geometry. He keeps saying the toe is “literally 90 degrees,” but it’s really more like 45 degrees. Regardless of the degree, he says the various parts of the toe make it a really complicated procedure.
Fixing the gangsta lean is a ridiculous, 6-hour procedure requiring something called the “home run screw,” enough pins to remind me of the Hellraiser movies, and power tools that either set k-wires or create room for activities..
Next. My Feet Are Killing Me: ET Phone Home "Long Distance". dark
Until next Thursday and another great episode of My Feet Are Killing Me, avoid kicking rocks barefoot and try to trim your toenails.