5 Atrocities Netflix is cutting during the quarantine in April 2020

There are five atrocities that Netflix is cutting from their lineup in April 2020 to save the captive, quarantined audience.

Before we get to the complete garbage Netflix is throwing away when content is needed most, a quick note to say that not everything removed is deserving. There are a slew of great films being removed, and it feels like Netflix is almost punishing viewers.

The Shawshank Redemption, True Grit, Goodfellas, and The Dirty Dozen are just a few of the amazing options being removed from Netflix. With that said, let’s get to the dumpster fires.

1. Is there really a series being axed?

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Think about this for a moment. In the time when binge-watching a show of any kind is the most possible, taking away an entire series just shows how little interest there is. And that’s where Police Academy comes into the discussion.

Absolutely the entire series. Gone. ALL.SEVEN.ARE.GONE. Yes, when they enlisted the help of the citizens. That one, too. When they went to Miami? Absolutely eradicated from the library. Their Russian excursion? Buh-bye. And don’t forget about the last four of the series that nobody other than Steve Guttenberg’s mother watched.

My goodness, we’re all binging a documentary about a gay, polygamist, meth-addicted, tiger owning, faux country singer whose nemesis almost certainly fed her husband to tigers, and there’s not room for Police Academy in the queue? That’s just brutal. Especially considering the first one is kind of funny.

2. Food poisoning

Is it possible to actually get food poisoning from a movie? If so, Good Burger almost certainly made me buy Pepto-Bismol from Costco. How the hell did this movie ever get made? In my opinion, a good burger is well done, and this is more medium rare.

3. Air ball

Space Jam was a great idea, but a horrible movie. The technology just wasn’t good enough at the time to truly make the movie, and the entire thing is hokey.

Take the best basketball player ever, Michael Jordan, and combine him with Bugs Bunny and the rest of the Looney Toons in a half animated and half live-action film where they play basketball against alien monsters. Sorry, but it’s wack, and at the time it was just a marketing ploy to sell toys.

4. Family fun is overrated.

If you have kids under the age of eight, then Spy Kids might be your cup of tea. But that doesn’t make it a good movie. In fact, it’s atrocious. The child actors are less convincing than Tim Robbins as a professional baseball player in Bull Durham, and the green screen is laughable. Oh, and they battle giant thumbs as enemies.

5. Just plain ugly

What do you get when you combine Katherine Heigl and Gerard Butler in a romantic comedy? Other than a migraine, you get a horrible movie, The Ugly Truth, that does nothing but follow romantic comedy tropes. It’s a desperate, insipid “battle-of-the-sexes” with virtually zero laughs.

Thank you, Netflix, for taking these atrocities away from people who would have otherwise become nauseous viewing them.