Married at First Sight Season 12, Episode 4: Updated odds of success

We’re three episodes into this season of Married at First Sight and it feels like 20. Just following the drama between Paige and Chris is enough to carry the entire season.

After the actual marriages from the last episode, it’s time for the couples to settle into this crazy experiment. Not only will they learn about their new spouse, but they’ll also re-engage their new in-laws for advice and juicy secrets.

Let’s get to the details and the updated odds.

Married at First Sight Season 12 – The Updated odds of success

Briana and Vincent

She wanted tall, tan, nice physique. All blocks checked. No wedding “hanky panky,” however, most likely because the dude wore a long sleeve shirt to bed. Who does that?

Unsurprisingly, Briana’s interaction with Vincent’s family is superb. They love her mixture of bubbly personality and accomplished engineer. Meanwhile, Vincent’s time with her family is also really chill. As any parent would, Briana’s mother wants to know how Vincent will support them.

Back together, they’re too perfect for one another. Sadly, he has a death in the family that will definitely be trying.

Odds: Previous 99%, Current: 99%

Haley and Cyberdyne Systems Model T-800

Jake says he’s not a real verbal person, and nobody in the world is shocked. Hilariously, however, he talks her ear off the morning after the wedding. It’s all exercise, diet, judgment day, and Skynet.

Every discussion between the two proves the “experts” struck out. She likes to sleep in; he wakes at 7 a.m. to hunt Sarah Connor. Her social lifestyle is active, and he’s focused on buying a phased plasma rifle in a 40-watt range.

Haley meets with Jake’s parents and hears, “Jake was always kind of a loner.” Shocker. He sees her family and talks about his house/spa/weights/hot tub. Again. We do learn that Haley can get angry and need alone time, which works well for Jake and his video games.

They get back together and he talks about red meat again. Obv.

Odds: Previous 15%, Current: 5%

Clara and Ryan

Does it surprise anyone that Clara hunts for a ring tray in her bag just before bed and can’t find it because her suitcase is pure chaos? This couple will do well because Ryan is a good listener. Which is fine for her because she likes to talk. A lot. Even in her sleep.

Meeting the parents is pretty easy. Clara isn’t precisely what Ryan’s parents expected, but they’re supportive because they believe God has a plan. They ARE ministers after all. Potential fireworks are there because she dropped out of bible college, but nothing materializes.

Ultimately the pair decide communication may be their potential hurdle.

Odds: Previous 70%, Current 80%

Captain Morgan and Eric

Honeymoon night, and clearly he’s not a “make the first move guy”. She has to keep pulling him in for kisses. If he even remotely tried, he’d be able to send a letter to Penthouse.

Nonetheless, marriage night is PG-13. The major reveal for them is Eric’s previous marriage (i.e. military contract marriage), which is OK with her parents as long as it’s not recent (like Chris).

When Virginia meets his parents it becomes clear how she’ll keep her new husband: He’s gone days at a time as a pilot, which gives her those nights to party.

Odds: Previous 60%, Current: 80%

Paige and Huge Chest

The morning after the wedding, Chris left for breakfast and didn’t come back for hours. Upon finally returning, he is really blasé as if he didn’t just semi-ghost his wife after consummating the marriage, twice. Then he has the nerve to ask why she’s confused.

Let’s get this out of the way. The panic attack: fake. The tears: fraudulent. She felt obligated, and he wanted a conquest or something because he admits the attraction is lacking. Keep in mind he says this after having sex, twice.

The craziest part is when he has the gall to be upset upon finding out she revealed everything to his parents. (His father’s advice was to “ride it out.” Hilarious choice of words.). It’s almost like he forgot the time less than 24-hours ago when he talked about having a honeymoon baby.

Odds: Previous -500%, Current: -500%

At this point, if the episodes of Married at First Sight are going to be two hours long, at least an hour needs to be focused on Paige and Chris.

Married at First Sight airs Wednesdays on Lifetime at 8/7c.