Five Simpsons Episodes Perfect for a Snow Day
By Dave Gong
Ah, can you smell that? It’s the smell of a brand new year.
Just kidding. It’s the smell of your sinuses freezing, because if you live in nearly any part of the United States, you’re dealing with the type of winter only Chicagoans are prepared for.
Crazy freakin’ Chicagoans.
It’s tough out there. Temperatures are falling below zero, sidewalks, parking lots and roads are icy. What can you do? I’ll tell you what you can do.
Call in sick. Go get your favorite Snuggie, pour some whiskey in that coffee and binge-watch the very best of winter-themed episodes of The Simpsons. Here are our top five to help you get started.
5. Simpsons Roasting on an Open Fire – Season 1 Episode 1
This was the world’s first taste of The Simpsons back in 1989 and seeing as it’s a Christmas episode, it would be downright disrespectful to exclude it from a list about winter episodes.
Christmas is canceled for the Simpsons after Mr. Burns takes away employees’ Christmas bonuses and Marge is forced to spend the family’s savings on a tattoo removal procedure for Bart.
Homer takes a second job as a mall Santa to try to raise money for Christmas gifts, but loses his meager earnings placing a bet at the local dog racing track.
But it all worked out in the end, because the Simpsons and the world got to meet Santa’s Little Helper. Seriously, who doesn’t love that freaking dog?
4. Holidays of Future Passed – Season 23 Episode 9
Yeah, it’s another holiday episode. But let’s face it. Most of the show’s winter episodes are Christmas episodes. Springfield’s only snowy one week a year. TV logic.
Holidays of Future Passed is a non-canon episode exploring the lives of the Simpsons in the year 2041. It’s not the first time the show has time traveled, but this episode is one of the better, if not best, ones to do so.
Bart, now 40, is divorced with two sons who look like preppier versions of himself. Lisa is married to *shudder* Milhouse. They have a daugther, Zia, although it’s heavily implied she’s a clone of Lisa.
Maggie is a pregnant rock star. She still doesn’t speak in this episode, because as her medical droid said, “recent research has shown that the umbilical cord is also a vocal cord.”
Homer and Marge are still together (Homer’s opening virus emails via his brain, to hilarious effect.) Homer’s sober in 2041, crafting ships in bottles. But he’d still smash ’em all for one lousy beer.
Oh and in a stunning move of tragic, unintended foreshadowing, Homer killed Edna Krabapple. “Holidays of Future Passed” aired in 2011. Marcia Wallace, the longtime voice of Bart’s teacher, died in 2013.
The family goes through the usual ups and downs typical of any Christmas episode. Bart learns to be a better dad and his kids learn to cut him some slack. Lisa learns that she’s Zia’s role-model and (presumably) learns to lighten up a little. Maggie has her baby.
Oh and Ents are totally real, guys.
Overall, a solidly funny episode that’s a much-watch for the warmth-deprived this winter.
3. Mountain of Madness – Season 8 Episode 12
So, Homer royally screws up a fire drill and Mr. Burns organizes a company teamwork retreat as punishment. On top of Mt. Useful. In winter. Yeah, that’s going to end well.
Burns forces the employees to pair off, instructing them to compete to reach the cabin at the peak. The last team to arrive would be fired. So of course, Burns and Homer cheat.
They arrive first, but their champagne toast causes an avalanche. The pair are buried in the cabin and go progressively more insane. Obviously, this leads to a violent confrontation between Homer and Burns.
I have to say, Burns is pretty spry for his age.
2. Skinner’s Sense of Snow – Season 12 Episode 8
A massive blizzard hits Springfield a day before winter break, but Principal Skinner refuses to shut the school down early.
Only a few kids show up and Skinner forces them to watch a long, terrible Christmas movie titled “The Christmas That Almost Wasn’t But Then Was.” Once the movie ends, the kids are dismayed to find they’re snowed in and Skinner won’t let them leave.
Skinner dons his old Army attire from Vietnam and begins to treat the school like a POW camp. After he stops Bart from tunneling out through a chute, the students revolt.
They take Skinner prisoner and set about trashing the school. Homer and Ned Flanders save the day by driving Ned’s car — with a section of Ned’s roof on the front — into a nearby salt silo. The snow melts, Ned’s car rusts through.
Hallucinations. ‘Nam flashbacks. “Ball sack” jokes.
All is well in Springfield.
1. Mr. Plow – Season 4 Episode 9
“Call Mr. Plow,
That’s my name.
That name again is Mr. Plow.”
If you’re even a passing Simpsons fan, you know that jingle.
Homer rear-ends Marge’s car during whiteout conditions and gets duped into buying a snowplow at the Springfield Auto Show.
“Pally, this doesn’t cost money, it makes money,” the totally legit car salesman told Homer.
On mistaken advice from Homer, Barney Gumble opens up Plow King to compete with Mr. Plow, embarking on an advertising smear campaign designed to ruin Homer’s fledgling business. It works.
Enraged that he now can’t make the payments on his truck, Homer pranks Barney with a job on top of Forbidding Widows Peak. Barney gets stuck and a guilty Homer heads up the mountain to retrieve him.
Obviously, Homer’s truck gets repossessed. Because… well, obviously.