A dude’s Vanderpump Rules power rankings Season 7, Episode 18

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Photo Credit: Vanderpump Rules/NBC by Tommy Garcia, Acquired From NBCUniversal Media Village /

On last night’s episode of Vanderpump Rules, the gang returned home from Mexico in high spirits, but found the spectre of interacting with James too much to bear.

Previously on Vanderpump Rules, the gang was down in Mexico getting blackout drunk, acting fools, and revelling in the fact that they didn’t invite James. However, the trip was marred by some couples conflicts, as first Schwartz and Katie had a tiff over his lack of attentiveness in the proceeding months while starting up TomToms.

Then, last week Stassi broke down and freaked out on Beau because of all her past trust issues, and Lala had a panic attack (unrelated but it will become relevant again in this episode). Who rose and who fell in this week’s episode of Vanderpump Rules?

13. Kristen (last week’s ranking: 8)

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We didn’t get a ton from Kristen in this episode, which counts as a win in my book, but what we did get was just painful. First, we get to hear everyone gush about how Kristen acted like a human being on this trip to Mexico, which is like me praising the neighbor’s dog for not mauling me the second I leave the house. Congrats, Doute, you have the emotional stability of a house of cards during an earthquake as opposed to a hurricane.

I had hope that Kristen might make it through the episode on a positive note when we got to see and hear a lot about how Kristen and Ariana developed a relationship that started as heated rivals. If Ariana is going to vouch for the girl, she can’t be all bad, right?

However, she ruins that one humanizing moment by saying that she is a “mariposa” (Spanish for butterfly) and does the butterfly flapping mime. I want to slam my head through a glass window.